I’ve come to the conclusion that popular fashion and I just aren’t going to be getting along this year. The summer stuff was frightening (holy neon colors, Batman!), and while I had high hopes for fall, it’s really looking no better. When when you call this “elegant”…

OK, first of all…they call it a “cotton top,” which makes it sound somewhat respectable, if not plain, but let’s face it, it’s just a hoodie. Embellished, perhaps, but still, a hoodie. A shapeless, colorless, boring old hoodie. Sweatshirt of college champions…or just sleep-deprived college students. Hoodies are not stylish or interesting, they’re workout wear, or something you put on when you’re desperately cold or sick and don’t care how you look. And the kangaroo pouch on the front?  Unless you want to look pregnant when you’re not, probably not a great fashion choice.

Second, the outfit description says “jeggings,” which would be bad enough, but if you look closer, the item pictured, based on its actual description, is actually leggings, a questionable choice for a plus-size woman in the first place. Now, I’m sorry, but leggings are not meant to be worn with a shirt this short, (if they’re to be worn at all). Leggings belong under a full-on tunic, or, even better, a dress. Preferably on someone under the age of 12. But I digress.

My favorite part is the so-called “ballet flat,” though. Again, if you look closer at the actual product description, this is no ballet flat. No, it’s actually a “smoking slipper.” A slipper!

So, this allegedly “elegant” outfit that I’m supposed to wear on the streets of New York City (where the photos in the catalog were taken)? Yes, it’s just glorified jammies, from the cotton top and leggings, right on down to the slippers. It may be comfortable, but I’m completely missing the “style” in this outfit.  In a world where I see people at the school and the store in actual jammies, I guess this shouldn’t surprise me. And if people want to dress like this, it’s fine by me, but it shouldn’t be called fashion or style….it’s comfort wear. In an actual fashion shoot from a well-known company like Lane Bryant, however, I’ve come to expect something with actual style and interest, not something that looks like you just rolled out of bed.

Maybe the fashions for 2013 will be a little more tolerable…