“Damn Stalin, Truman, or whoever!” Corporal Maxwell Klinger, “Aid Station,” season three, episode 19

“I’m from Toledo. My mother was mugged bringing me home from the hospital.” Corporal Maxwell Klinger, “Aid Station,” season three, episode 19

Frank, it’s after six. You can stop being snotty.” Lt. Colonel Henry Blake, “Aid Station,” season three, episode 19

“I can’t throw up and salute at the same time.” Captain Trapper John McIntyre, “Aid Station,” season three, episode 19

“He slipped on a bar of soap!” Major Margaret Houlihan, “House Arrest,” season three, episode 18

“I’ve had my underwear on backwards for a month.” Lt. Colonel Henry Blake, “House Arrest,” season three, episode 18

“If we don’t go crazy once in a while, we’ll all go crazy.” Captain Hawkeye Pierce, “Bulletin Board,” season three, episode 16

“Colonel… if you can hear me, knock three times! If you can’t, knock twice!” Corporal Maxwell Klinger, “Bombed,” season three, episode 15

“I’ve got Command on my tail! And a hospital full of Greeks waiting on a lamb that’s on a plane on his way to Iowa to become Radar’s little brother!” Lt. Colonel Henry Blake, “Private Charles Lamb,” season three, episode 14

“Attention, all personnel: Please contact Colonel Blake if anyone knows the whereabouts of tonight’s entrée. In the meantime, be on the lookout for a white Caucasian lamb. He is reported to be unarmed and considered to be delicious.” P.A. Announcer, “Private Charles Lamb,” season three, episode 14