I’m not much of a conspiracy theorist.

The way the banking industry operates, however, may make me change my mind.

We were supposed to receive our new “coupon book” for our mortgage payments back in June. No book arrived. That’s OK…the bill wasn’t actually due until August 1, so we had plenty of time. But, July kept ticking by, and still no book. So, we finally called, and were told that it *had* been mailed out, but they could send out another one…it just may take two weeks for us to get it. (Did I mention that this is a local bank?)

OK, fine. Obviously, I couldn’t get the payment in the mail in time for the August 1 payment, so I stopped by a bank branch to pay it one day while I was out. And the conspiracy begins. While I’m waiting for my payment to be processed, the teller starts talking to me about checking accounts, and why we should switch to their bank. I tell her we’re not interested right now, but I’ll keep it in mind.

So, now it’s August. Still haven’t received the coupon book. Call again, they’ll mail it again, may take two weeks, blah, blah, blah. So, back to the bank branch I go, to make the September 1 payment. And, again, while I’m waiting for the payment to be processed, the teller starts pushing checking accounts. And this time, she even gives me paperwork to look over, in case I change my mind.

Total conspiracy. I’m guessing that they figure if they don’t send out the payment book, I’ll have to keep going into the branch, and eventually they’ll wear me down, and I’ll agree to another account with them. At this point, it’s the only possible explanation I can think of as to why we haven’t received one of the three payment books that have been supposedly mailed out. Clearly, this was their plan all along!

I’m just waiting to see what happens in September. At this point, I’m not too confident that we’ll ever receive the payment book, and I’m thinking that the next time I go into the branch, they just may sign me up for a checking account while I’m standing there, without even asking. Total conspiracy!